Had an enjoyable day. Went out for picnic. Then I was back home very late, showered and tried to sleep.
Once again, I am lying in bed, tossing and turning.
After about 2 hours of failing to make myself sleep, I finally turned on my PC.
What is keeping me awake now ?
D has flown to Australia.
Reminded me that time has drawn closer for me to execute my plans to move over as well.
Something that I have logically and rationally decided to do.
(And I think this is the first time I admitted this ?)
But logic and rationale usually always fight big battles with emotions.
This time, I experience first-hand the fear and apprehension that KOP had faced, and what D must be facing now.
I can only imagine it growing in time to come...
Starting life in a new place, having to re-establish everything all over again ?
What if I can't make it ?
What if I become miserable ?
Am I stupid to throw everything that I have now ?
What if this is the worst mistake I will ever make in my whole life ?
These are the things that kept on running through my head...
And the rain is pouring outside...
Lightning flashing frequently...
Wind howling through my window...
I think I will have darker eyes, bigger eye-bags, and whiter hair for the next few months...
3 comments:
No matter what happen, at least you've tried and experienced something which not everyone will hv the chance to experience.
Although we will miss you,
我们永远支持你。
加油！加油！
You can never imagine the number of times and many sleepless nights that I went through before the move. Even now that I am in Australia and lucky to find a job so quickly, these questions still go through my mind.
It is really while trying to get things going for myself and the frustrations that I faced, that I can really appreciate and understand what KOP must have gone through.
But like what kingkong said, at least we had tried and experienced what it is like, rather than to grow old wondering what it would have been like.
Hello, it has been a long time since I visited your blog.
It may not have been Australia, but I did pack my bags and left for Bali last July 30. The first three months were tough, even though I had the S.O. supporting me.
Then when I finally settled in, we left Bali in Jan to get married in Spore then flew to Italy in Mar to prepare for our church wedding in June. We are here until Sept, and it is another learning experience. Although two months have passed, I recognise the same symptoms that I had in the first three months in Bali. Eventually, we hope to settle in NZ so we are both slowly working toward that, although I am not looking forward to the first three months there.
It hasn't been easy, whether it was Bali or Italy, and I don't think moving to Australia will be any easier.
However, I am still glad that I have these experiences. I feel more lucky, and alive, than others who always say "I wish I could do what you did." Just give it a shot!
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